{"id":116,"date":"2013-11-16T00:27:06","date_gmt":"2013-11-15T23:27:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/?p=116"},"modified":"2013-11-16T09:06:01","modified_gmt":"2013-11-16T08:06:01","slug":"krutomyval-hovno-versus-vetrak","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/?p=116","title":{"rendered":"Krutom\u00fdval: Hovno versus v\u011btr\u00e1k"},"content":{"rendered":"

1. Ur\u010dit\u011b to v\u0161ichni zn\u00e1te. Kdy\u017e se n\u011bco sere fakt hodn\u011b, zjev\u00ed se k tomu v\u011bt\u0161inou e\u0161t\u011b takzvan\u00fd „dominov\u00fd efekt“<\/em> a proud sra\u010dek tekouc\u00edch v\u00e1m na hlavu najednou zna\u010dn\u011b nab\u00edr\u00e1 na hutnosti.\u00a0Mo\u017en\u00e1 se budete divit, ale ani m\u011b se ob\u010das tenhle vodop\u00e1d v\u00fdkal\u016f dopadaj\u00edc\u00edch na m\u016fj \u010derstv\u00fd sest\u0159ih od Toni & Guy nevyhne. Jako nap\u0159\u00edklad dneska.<\/p>\n

2. Jak jist\u011b v\u00edte, u\u017e asi p\u016fl roku v pr\u00e1ci l\u017eu o tom, \u017ee sem vytvo\u0159il n\u011bjakej dokument, kterej sem moc l\u00ednej v realit\u011b vytvo\u0159it. P\u0159i\u0161lo mi, \u017ee to je takov\u00e1 ultra sra\u010dka, \u017ee nem\u00e1 cenu j\u00ed opravdu vyr\u00e1b\u011bt, proto\u017ee takov\u00fd hovadiny tenhle sv\u011bt nepot\u0159ebuje.<\/p>\n

3. Samoz\u0159ejm\u011b jednoduch\u00e9 by b\u00fdvalo bylo to delegovat na n\u011bjak\u00e9ho otroka. Jasn\u011b. J\u00e1 sem to taky pl\u00e1noval. Za t\u00edmto \u00fa\u010delem sem i vytvo\u0159il fiktivn\u00ed skupinu re\u00e1ln\u011b existuj\u00edc\u00edch nevoln\u00edk\u016f, kter\u00fdm sem dal pracovn\u00ed n\u00e1zev „focused working group<\/em>“ jako\u017ee budou zam\u011b\u0159en\u00ed na \u00a0vyblit\u00ed \u00a0toho c\u00edlov\u00e9ho dokumentu\u00a0(n\u011bjakej posranej manu\u00e1l k tomu jak vy\u0161et\u0159ovat vl\u00e1dn\u00ed top secret p\u0159\u00edpady v USA)<\/em>. \u00a0Fakt, \u017ee sem tu (imagin\u00e1rn\u00ed)<\/em> skupinu vytvo\u0159il, sem si dovolil n\u011bkdy v kv\u011btnu nadut\u011b prezentovat veden\u00ed a z toho sem byl pak vnit\u0159n\u011b s\u00e1m asi uchl\u00e1cholen pocitem, \u017ee sem „n\u011bco<\/em>“ pro zhmotn\u011bn\u00ed cel\u00e9 t\u00e9 dementnosti fakticky ud\u011blal. A samoz\u0159ejm\u011b tak na tu hovadinu okam\u017eit\u011b zapomn\u011bl. To sem celej j\u00e1. Ano, mo\u017en\u00e1 se pt\u00e1te pro\u010d sem tu grupu mudl\u016f co to za m\u011b v\u0161echno ud\u011blaj v\u00e1\u017en\u011b nedal dohromady. Pro\u010d, chcete v\u011bd\u011bt? Proto\u017ee to by bylo moc pr\u00e1ce a tu j\u00e1 nerad.<\/p>\n

4. O p\u00e1r m\u011bs\u00edc\u016f pozd\u011bji se m\u011b v\u00edceprezident firmy ve v\u00fdtahu le\u017e\u00e9rn\u011b\u00a0zeptal, jak se t\u00e9 skupin\u011b da\u0159\u00ed. Vylhal sem si na m\u00edst\u011b, \u017ee v\u00fdborn\u011b, \u017ee makaj jak barevn\u00fd a manu\u00e1l u\u017e brzy bude ready. Fajn. A mohl sem na to d\u00e1l zapomenout, zv\u011bdavost \u0161\u00e9fa byla ukojena a moje ochota se t\u00edm zab\u00fdvat tak\u00e9.<\/p>\n

5. V Z\u00e1\u0159\u00ed se hodnotil m\u016fj pokrok s prac\u00ed za cel\u00fd fisk\u00e1l. Tud\u00ed\u017e sem musel nejen lh\u00e1t d\u00e1l o tom \u017ee skupina poctiv\u011b fach\u00e1, ale e\u0161t\u011b vyblejt n\u011bjak\u00fd procenta m\u00edry hotovosti toho cel\u00fdho monstr projektu. \u00a0Blahosklonn\u011b sem si dal 95%, p\u00e1\u010d 100 mi p\u0159i\u0161lo nadut\u00e9 a cokoliv pod 90 trapn\u00e9 za rok pr\u00e1ce p\u0159eci.<\/p>\n

6. V \u0158\u00edjnu sem dostal p\u0159id\u00e1no a rozhodlo se i o sympatick\u00e9m v\u00e1no\u010dn\u00edm bonusu, tak\u017ee moje motivace d\u00e1le p\u0159edst\u00edrat jakoukoliv pr\u00e1ci samoz\u0159ejm\u011b klesla na dal\u0161\u00ed rok naprosto pod bod mrazu.<\/p>\n

7. \u00a0V Listopadu se m\u011b p\u00e1r vlezl\u00fdch \u010dlen\u016f intern\u00edho auditu dovolilo zeptat na ten manu\u00e1l, \u017ee pr\u00fd by ho hrozn\u011b r\u00e1di za\u010dali pou\u017e\u00edvat. Hovada. Nemaj nic lep\u0161\u00edho na pr\u00e1ci, ne\u017e m\u011b prudit v pr\u00e1ci prac\u00ed? \u0158ekl sem jim \u017ee je samoz\u0159ejm\u011b ready a brzy jim ho po\u0161lu.<\/p>\n

8. \u00a0V pond\u011bl\u00ed sem, jak v\u00edte, odlet\u011bl n\u00e1hle z USA do Prahy zachra\u0148ovat Lasici<\/a>. Akce Free Lassie st\u00e1le e\u0161t\u011b prob\u00edh\u00e1, a i kdy\u017e vypad\u00e1, \u017ee dopadne \u00fasp\u011b\u0161n\u011b, budu o n\u00ed schopen referovat nejd\u0159\u00edv z\u00edtra. Na dne\u0161ek sem si tedy napl\u00e1noval bo\u017e\u00ed rande. Kdy\u017e tak stoj\u00edm s novou luxusn\u00ed a pr\u00e1v\u011b sbalenou sle\u010dnou v dev\u011bt ve\u010der p\u0159ed Hemingway barem v Karol\u00edny Sv\u011btl\u00e9, kam sme se chystali na p\u00e1r lahodn\u00fdch koktejl\u016f, \u00a0ud\u011bl\u00e1m tu chybu a kouknu se na telefon. Tam je email s vyk\u0159i\u010dn\u00edkem. Ejhle. To nikdy nev\u011bst\u00ed nic dobr\u00e9ho. P\u00ed\u0161e \u0161\u00e9f, \u017ee samotn\u00fd prezident firmy u\u017e se sh\u00e1n\u00ed po tom manu\u00e1lu a o\u010dek\u00e1v\u00e1 \u017ee mu ho okam\u017eit\u011b po\u0161lu.<\/p>\n

9. Co na to \u0159\u00edct? „Sedm Kurev<\/em>“ a „Kurvap\u00ed\u010daprdelposran\u00e1“<\/em> mi p\u0159\u00ed\u0161lo jako jedin\u00e1 adekv\u00e1tn\u00ed reakce. Svle\u010dnu sem musel posadit do tax\u00edku a s\u00e1m vyspeedovat druh\u00fdm do bytu, kde sem zasedl ke kompu a jal se googlovat n\u011bjak\u00fd \u0161ikovn\u00fd vzor toho manu\u00e1lu, kdy\u017e u\u017e to ne\u0161lo na nikoho delegovat, proto\u017ee jako glob\u00e1ln\u00ed \u0161\u00e9f sekce „forenzn\u00ed\u00a0vy\u0161et\u0159ov\u00e1n\u00ed<\/em>“ m\u00e1m sice pod sebou spoustu otrok\u016f, ale jeliko\u017e teda p\u016fl roku tvrd\u00edm v\u0161em vokolo, \u017ee na tom m\u00ed posluhova\u010di pe\u010dliv\u011b makaj, t\u011b\u017eko se jednomu z nich te\u010f m\u016f\u017eu ozvat s rozkazem, a\u0165 b\u011bhem p\u0159\u00ed\u0161t\u00edch p\u011bti hodin vyflusne dokument co m\u00e1 m\u00edt tak 40 vysoce odborn\u00fdch str\u00e1nek na t\u00e9ma „Jak Nejl\u00e9pe Vy\u0161et\u0159it Prob\u00edhaj\u00edc\u00ed Hrozbu \u00datoku na Prezidenta USA<\/em>„<\/p>\n

10. Tak\u017ee moment\u00e1ln\u011b u\u017e druhou hodinu zava\u0159uju nejen Google ale i v\u0161echny sv\u00e9 k\u00e1mo\u0161e z Friends of WikiLeaks a podobn\u00fdch podvratn\u00fdch organizac\u00ed, co sou ochotn\u00e9 p\u0159ilo\u017eit ruku k d\u00edlu, kdy\u017e je mi fakt \u00fazko a to d\u00edlo je vedle Anglick\u00e9 A12 dostate\u010dn\u00fdm d\u016fkazem o existenci \u010e\u00e1bla na Zemi. Jako t\u0159eba tohle a te\u010f. Nu\u017ee, modleme se, a\u0165 mi n\u011bkdo z nich b\u011bhem p\u0159\u00ed\u0161t\u00edch p\u00e1r hodin po\u0161le zcela fam\u00f3zn\u00ed n\u00e1st\u0159el toho dokumentu, co j\u00e1 jen pak trochu p\u0159eb\u00e1sn\u00edm, pocuch\u00e1m a po\u0161lu \u0161\u00e9fovi jako ten sv\u016fj u\u017e p\u016fl roku hotov\u00fd majstrskvost. To je teda hore\u010dka p\u00e1te\u010dn\u00ed noci, ale fakt, kdybych nebyl tak nasranej, \u017ee mus\u00edm pracovat, tak se ze sv\u00e9ho smutn\u00e9ho \u00fad\u011blu asi s\u00e1m rozbre\u010d\u00edm!<\/p>\n

\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

1. Ur\u010dit\u011b to v\u0161ichni zn\u00e1te. Kdy\u017e se n\u011bco sere fakt hodn\u011b, zjev\u00ed se k tomu v\u011bt\u0161inou e\u0161t\u011b takzvan\u00fd „dominov\u00fd efekt“ a proud sra\u010dek tekouc\u00edch v\u00e1m na hlavu najednou zna\u010dn\u011b nab\u00edr\u00e1 na hutnosti.\u00a0Mo\u017en\u00e1 se budete divit, ale ani m\u011b se ob\u010das tenhle vodop\u00e1d v\u00fdkal\u016f dopadaj\u00edc\u00edch na m\u016fj \u010derstv\u00fd sest\u0159ih od Toni & Guy nevyhne. Jako nap\u0159\u00edklad … Pokra\u010dov\u00e1n\u00ed textu Krutom\u00fdval: Hovno versus v\u011btr\u00e1k<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_editorskit_title_hidden":false,"_editorskit_reading_time":0,"_editorskit_is_block_options_detached":false,"_editorskit_block_options_position":"{}"},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/116"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=116"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/116\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":118,"href":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/116\/revisions\/118"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=116"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=116"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.krutomyval.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=116"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}